Make the plans, don’t plan the outcome
I catch myself trying to control the outcome all the time. It’s frustrating. Of all the things I have control over in my life, the outcome is not one of them.
This is probably common sense for many of you. But it took me a long time to really understand how this works.
The best way I can describe it is like this: I do a lot of speaking and workshops. I prepare, I practice, I show up and deliver. Then I have to walk away. Whatever the outcome, it’s out of my control.
Of course I have hopes for the outcome. I hope people enjoyed it. I hope people were transformed in some way. I hope I delivered something valuable to them. I hope they hire me to come back and do it again!
But I can’t control any of that. I can’t make people do what I want.
There was a time when I thought I could. I thought I had to control the outcome, actually! That kind of pressure is intense, and defeating. Because it’s impossible.
But there’s one more piece to this puzzle that I’ve learned. Once you let go of the outcome, you entrust it to the universe. And in my experience, the real outcomes are so much better than the ones I had hoped for.
Stick with me for a minute... I’m not crazy.
When I look back at the series of actions and outcomes that have made up my life I can clearly see the difference between what I wanted, and what actually happened.
I have indisputable evidence that my outcomes would have fallen short by an order of magnitude.
Once I incorporated that understanding into my life today, I have so much more freedom to show up, do my best, and enjoy the show.
I have less fear of the future. I have less fear of people and what they think of me. I have less fear that I’m going to make a mistake and ruin everything. Because even that is part of the show.
And to be totally honest, my mistakes usually end up with some pretty interesting outcomes!
So, charge forward, make the plans, but don’t plan the outcome... enjoy how it unfolds!